Category Archives: first steps

Coaching – Accusations Unacceptable

“Mistakes are part of the dues one pays for a full life.” – Sophia Loren Hindsight is a great accuser. It seems that no matter what decision we make there is always a decision we could have made that was better. Sometimes it can even seem as if the secondary choice would have made the world of difference for us. Sadly we can get bogged down in personal or business failure. Consider a choice that was made by the Portland Trailblazers back in 1984. The Trailblazers were a rising star franchise in the NBA. They had a solid unit, but they needed a stellar center and they thought the 7’1” Sam Bowie was a perfect fit. They watched as Akeem Olajuwon was taken as first pick and they made what seemed to be a solid choice for their second pick draft selection. Sam Bowie would be the capstone on an all-star lineup. Portland probably looked at the young man that would be chosen third in the draft, but the didn’t need a shooting guard, they already had two players skilled in that position. Leg injuries would plague Bowie, the tall center from Portland, while the third pick went on to be considered the best that had ever played the game of basketball. Michael Jordan was that overlooked player. His contributions to the Chicago Bulls are well noted while sports history can only seem to observe the selection of Bowie as a colossal blunder on the part of the Trailblazers. On paper the selection of Jordan made no sense for the Trailblazers while the selection of Bowie showed tremendous promise. Some in the realm of sports reporting consider the Bowie pick to be the biggest mistake in sports history. What does that have to do with online business? The Portland Trailblazers are still a team and Sam Bowie went on to serve three different NBA teams in his own low-key style. Bowie would never reach the same place experienced by Michael Jordan, but he remained a solid contributor. The same situation happens every day in online business. One product is chosen over another and fails to live up to the hype or one business model shows great promise, but fails. I don’t know what Sam Bowie would say today about how history views his entrance into the NBA, but he continues to experience success as a businessman. As an online business owner you can’t let the failures (real and perceived) of the past dictate what you can and can’t do in business today. If you have failed, admit that to yourself and move on. “If a mistake is not a stepping stone, it is a mistake.” – Eli Siegel

An Attitude Change Is The Biggest Change You Will Ever Make

You may have heard it said before that an attitude change is easy. All you have to do is change everything about yourself. As crazy as it seems, it’s the truth. A change in your attitude will eventually involve everything about you. It’s easy and yet, the fact that you have to keep at it day after day after day is what makes it really hard. An attitude change requires a long term perseverance that few people have. That’s what makes it the biggest change you will ever make. Attitude changes typically take place when something monumental happens in a person’s life that suddenly makes them see everything differently. This may be a near-death experience or some kind of tragedy that they weren’t expecting. People begin to see that life is extremely fragile and they begin to think that maybe the real meaning of life is contained in something other than the things they used to value so much. They begin to change their values to and to approach life from a new perspective about what is truly important. It doesn’t have to be a tragedy or a near-death experience, however, which brings this about. An attitude change can take place simply because you decide that you want to make yourself into a better person and you are determined to make that happen. One of the most common reasons for bringing about an attitude change, besides a tragedy or near-death experience is the simple fact that a person becomes fed up with the life they have been living. They no longer see themselves as a worthwhile individual and they want to feel good about themselves again. Maybe it was just a little thing that went wrong in their life but it was somehow the straw that broke the camel’s back and now they are ready to really change their life. How do they get serious about this plan and make themselves actually stick to the new changes that they have in mind for themselves? What do they need to do to actually make this attitude change a reality? One of the best ways to really make your attitude change stick is to join a group and make a commitment to go to that group several times a week in order to remind yourself about the changes you are trying to make. Other people can do wonders for your attitude and make you stick to the promises you have made for yourself simply because you feel more support from other people when you join a group. It really doesn’t matter who the people are in the group and whether you like them or not. This is not how an attitude change works. The change takes place because you make a commitment to make friends with some new people who are trying to do the same thing as you are trying to do; i.e. improve you life! You go to the group, not because the people are so great or you love them so much. You go to the group because you are trying to make yourself a better person and you know that you can’t really do it on your own. This is called humility and it is a primary ingredient in bringing about an attitude change in anyone. You have to be able to admit that you can’t do everything on your own. People don’t become educated doctors or lawyers on their own. They go to school and classes to achieve this. Similarly, you can’t change your attitude and become a new person on your own. You need other people! If you are serious about making an attitude change in yourself, you will make a commitment to join a group and start working toward your goal with others who are also interested in the same thing. There are thousands of groups out there and you can find one that fits the interests you have to make a change. Attitude change is easy but it takes concerted effort over a long period of time. What better way to devote yourself to this long term goal than to try out a new group and make a commitment to help out each week. You will surely be on the road to success once you have made that decision!

Powerfully Manifest Your Fullest Life Yet!

The other day I wrote myself a love note. I was feeling a little down and I needed a pick-me-up. It was simple really, and it only took me about 10 minutes. I hardly thought about it either before or after I wrote it. When I shared it with someone a few hours later she just looked at me with a dead-pan serious stare and said “That is the most beautiful piece you have ever written. I’m stunned.” I was a little taken aback at the power and plainness of her statement and it inspired me to read it again more slowly. Then I was stunned. I had never read words both so commanding and so tender all at the same time. When I shared it with others they thought it was the most beautiful note to have been written to me by someone else. But I had written this to myself?! As I read the love note again the words felt absolutely true at the deepest levels of awareness and understanding. But where had they come from so unbidden? What was happening in my life that I could write them so easily and so fluidly without thinking or pausing? Then it struck me – for years now I have been actively and aggressively cultivating self-awareness, self-empathy, and compassionate presence with myself and others. For the last several months I have been pouring nearly all my energy into the manifestation of my vision of myself as an empathetic, compassionate, intuitive and powerful being. I realized that I had stopped thinking from my head about matters of the heart and stopped thinking from my heart about matters of the head. More simply put, I had untangled the mess of overlapping emotion and intellect and through the process of separation had neatly brought them into the harmony of symbiosis. My head and my heart were entwining powerfully together in ways I had never conceived of and the result of the union was, well, something as simple as the air I breathe. I loved myself. This was not just the love of a healthy self-esteem but was the deeper love of a true satisfaction with self. This was a love of empowerment and tranquility. These words and this feeling of love were expressions of my fullest self yet and they were leading to the manifestation of my fullest life yet. I realized that everything I have wanted is now within reach and coming around the corner of my life. I am on the verge of a deep and powerful explosion of….success! As I sat back and pondered this realization of self and process I wondered what would come next. What happens after success? Slowly I began to realize that success is just the middle. It would be a “C” average if life were graded. Success is just the beginning of fully living where we are accomplished and generating pleasure. Success is where we begin the discovery process of happiness and satisfaction. Success is a place of work though and it must constantly be maintained. This is where the dominant paradigm of our culture exists as well. “You must work to succeed” many self-help books will tell us. We can build tools and processes around success as well. We can build rules and goals and metrics for success even! We can know “without a doubt” that we have succeeded. In fact, a huge portion of our industry and economy is built around this “struggle to succeed.” Authors, motivational speakers and teachers earn millions on the subject of success. Success is just the beginning though. It is adequate, ordinary and sufficient. Sadly, this is where many people stop growing as they think there is nothing more. Success is where we accomplish our goals and just begin to have a vision of the future, though. There is more, much more, and the next step is called thriving. Thriving is where our needs become fully met. This would be a “B” if life were graded. Life gets easier here. Joy is abundant and fulfillment begins. When we are thriving we begin to come alive and a glow of energy is often noticed to permeate around us. This is the point in living where we begin to notice that life is about more than just work and begin to see the abundance of life. For the first time, in thriving, we are able to move past the struggle of surviving and the work of succeeding. It is a place of pleasure, pleasure at having moved past succeeding. Being in thriving space allows us to begin to open ourselves to the greater possibilities of life. We begin to notice some of the limiting behaviors that have defined our existence up until now and we begin to change them. When we are thriving there is more energy as well that empowers us, drives us and moves us forward in new and exciting ways. We become more available to ourselves and others emotionally and physically. We allow ourselves to generate new ideas that, for the first time, reach beyond just our own success. When we are thriving we are in control of our growth. We are able to guide it and direct it and know where it is going. Thriving is where abundance begins to be seen and understood. There is always more with just a little effort. Thriving is still not the top grade in life, though. The “A” grade in life is powerful manifestation. This is the place I had written my love note from. There is no wanting or needing when we live in powerful manifestation. In this stage we are creating and receiving. We are creating that which we most deeply desire in life. The desire comes from the deepest levels of our soul with full awareness and vision into our true self. From this place of depth we can create exactly that which nourishes us to the fullest extent possible and beyond. In this place of powerful manifestation we are no longer “working” at anything. Life becomes effortless as we step into the flow and energy of the universe in a way that allows us to generate on demand that which we most need at that moment – whether we know it or not. When we are fully embracing creation it extends out and beyond that which we can easily see and touch. This extension invites in new energy that is not within our control, though it is benevolent! The invitation requires that we allow ourselves to receive this new energy which we are not always aware of. What we are receiving is abundance. Abundance is not something we can control but is instead something that we must embrace, or more simply put – accept. When we are receiving we remove the blocks that have limited us and held us back. We let go of that which no longer serves us and that which does not belong to us anymore. Just as life becomes effortless with creation we become weightless when we are receiving. The burden is no longer ours to bare alone or even at all! In powerful manifestation creation and receiving begin to blend together as one. They simply become the universal “flow”. When we step fully into powerful manifestation we not only see clearly, create effortlessly that which we need most and receive abundantly that which we don’t even need to ask for. We also have full awareness and can allow both ourselves and others to be in their true nature and true being. As we let go of the ties and binds that hold us down and keep us back we discover a sense of freedom like nothing we have known before. The freedom of powerful manifestation is quite simply the ability to “just be.” When we allow ourselves to just be we become more than we ever have been before. In success we were able to reach a place of happiness and satisfaction. As we moved into thriving we stepped into joy and fulfillment and our needs became fully met. We begin to come alive and saw beyond the struggles of success, though some control and effort was still required. In powerful manifestation life becomes effortless and abundant beyond our control. Our needs become met spontaneously in ways we weren’t even aware they were wanting. As we step fully into the flow of powerful manifestation we release any need to control and simply discover what comes next as it happens neither needing nor wanting nor restricting anything. We reach a place of awe were everything and everyone is full of beauty and power and perfection – and the awe extends far beyond that which we can see. Thus, my love note was perfectly created in that moment
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f openness and powerful manifestation and awe. If the love note were graded it would be an “A+”. It was a window into my future. I had taken a step forward in my own process too. It was the fullest my life had been yet.

Your Last Resort: Stop Smoking Pill

As we always see on cigarette packs, “Cigarette smoking is dangerous to your health.” This is a notice that is commonly disregarded by smokers. Without even reading this notice, they just tear open the cigarette pack, grab a stick, and light it as if they don’t want to see the glaring truth in front of it. Unfortunately, the warning stated on this package is very true. Cigarette smoking is one of the leading causes of death. As a matter of fact, 440,000 people in the United States die each year because of illnesses caused by this bad habit. Fortunately, a lot of people have become aware of what smoking can do to their health and have made attempts to quit. Unfortunately, because of a substance called nicotine that is found in cigarettes, many people find it difficult to resist their cravings for the “high” that this substance can give. The good news is that there are now aids for smokers who want to quit. They can try chewing a nicotine gum or putting on a nicotine patch. These are two of the types of nicotine replacement therapy wherein the craving for the pleasurable feelings is quenched by the content of these gums and patches, taking away the need for a stick of cigarette. But, since this method is not always effective, a new option has been added: the stop smoking pill. A New Use for an Anti-depressant Zyban is a stop smoking pill that causes a sustained release of bupropion hydrochloride, the same substance found in the anti-depressant, Wellbutrin SR. This stop smoking pill boosts the levels of dopamine and norepinephrine in the body, giving the user the same pleasurable feeling that is induced by the nicotine found in tobacco. These pills should be taken a week before a smoker starts to quit smoking in order to combat the withdrawal symptoms that usually haunt quitters. Although Zyban is more effective than other anti-depressants in this aspect, it has some side effects that doctors should warn their patients about before prescribing this solution. It has been proven to cause depression in users and can increase suicidal tendencies. The New Stop Smoking Pill Another stop smoking pill was approved by the FDA last May. Varenicline was proven to help more than one out of five smokers to stop smoking after using it for a year. This pill works by inhibiting the feelings of pleasure that smokers feel when they light up a cigarette. This stops them from associating the wonderful feeling with a stick of cigarette that they usually crave for when they are under stress, cutting off their dependency to it. Now available under the name of Chantix, this drug should be taken twice a day for a minimum of twelve weeks in order to stop a person from lighting up a cigarette. A side effect of this stop smoking pill is said to be nausea and vomiting. Because of the side effects that can be caused by these two stop smoking pills, they are usually considered as a last resort for people who would like to quit smoking. And for those who plan to use Zyban to quit smoking, perhaps it should be coupled with exercise in order to decrease the dependency on that medication. Exercise, after all, can hasten the release of epinephrine and norepinephrine in the body, giving a person the same high feeling that these pills can provide.

What You Should Know Before You Get A Tattoo Or Piercing

Before getting a tattoo or a body piercing find out what all the risks are and how to get rid of the tattoo or body piercing if you no longer want it. A tattoo may only take a few minutes to get but it can last a lifetime. Tattoos are permanent. They are designs put on your skiing with pigments injected into the top layer of your skin with needles.

Here is how tattoos are created: A needle is connected to an apparatus with tubes which contain dye. These needles pierce the skin multiple times kind of like a sewing machine but on your skin. The needle inserts tiny drops of ink creating the tattoo. Tattoos can hurt and a large tattoo can take up to several hours to create. The tattoo may even bleed What are the downsides of getting a tattoo? You are piercing your skin so you may be a risk for more skin infections if you get a tattoo or piercing.

If you get a tattoo you put yourself at risk for getting blood related diseases. If the machine the tattoo artist uses you can you can get hepatitis C, hepatitis B, tetanus, tuberculosis and even HIV. If you use red ink in your tattoos you may get a rash with bumps. Tattoos can also lead to bacterial infections. The symptoms are redness, warmth, swelling and pus. Again if you use red ink in your tattoo this can cause allergic reactions that can last for years. Your tattoo will also require cleaning and maintenance. Your tattoo artist will give you instructions on how to clean and maintain your tattoo.

You should apply skin care products and avoid too much exposure to the sun for your tattoo. Especially in the beginning. Tattoos takes several days to heal. Do not pick at the tattoo. Give the tattoo time to heal properly. What if you want to get rid of your tattoo? This is very common. Tattoo removal is difficult and often still leaves scars and skin discolorations. Laser surgery if the best way to get rid of a tattoo. Laser beams penetrate the top layer of the skin and the light is accepted by the tattoo.

This method may demand up to 10 treatments over a period of a year and even then the tattoo might not completely disappear. Another method of tattoo removal is called Dermabrasion. The tattoo is frozen until the skin is numb then the skin is sanded down. This method does not hurt very much but it usually leaves a scar. You can also remove that tattoo surgically but this invariably leaves a scar.